The 55 Very Best Goat Puns and Jokes

The 55 Very Best Goat Puns and Jokes

Everyone loves a great pun! Whether they make you laugh or groan, you can find a pun for almost any topic. From eggcellent Easter jokes to a fusilli Italian jokes, there’s something for everyone.

Here you’ll find plenty of hilarious goat puns and jokes to graze on. Whether you need something to cheer you up or to annoy friends with, you’ll find it here. 

But first, here’s some goat facts:

Goats and dogs are alike in a number of ways: they have a similar lifespan, they can be taught to respond to their name and come when called, they were both domesticated over 10,000 years ago, not to mention that they both have four legs and other mammalian features, but you already knew that part!

Goats have rectangular pupils so they have greater field of vision, allowing them to see 320-240 degrees compared to humans with 160-210. Now that’s impressive!

Okay, it’s time to kid around – let’s goat!


Goat Puns: I Herd These Are Goats’ Favourite Things

What’s a goat’s favourite musical? The Goatest Showman.

What’s a goat’s favourite Chinese meal? Chicken Satyr.

What’s a goat’s favourite song to sing? Bleat It.

What’s a goat’s favourite game? Grand Thooft Auto.

What’s a goat’s favourite hobby? Goat Kart racing.

What’s a goat’s favourite sports position? Goatkeeper.

What’s a goat’s favourite film? The Goatfather.

What do you call a goat’s hero? A Billy Idol.

What’s a goat’s favourite Eagles song? Goatel California.

What’s a goat’s favourite instrument? A goatar.

What’s a goat’s favourite designer? Jean Paul Goatier.

What’s a goat’s favourite animal? An alligoator.

Next: 80 Paw-Some Dog Puns


Buck-le Up, Here’s Some Goat Jokes!

What do you call a goat who has a kid for another goat? A surrogoat.

What did the nanny say to the naughty kid? “It’s pasture bedtime!” 

Who’s the biggest business mogul in the goat world? Bill Goats.

How does goat’s milk taste? Udderly delicious!

Why did the goat apply a bandage to the wound? To stop the bleating!

Why couldn’t the goats get along? They kept butting heads.

What did the goat say when he looked in the mirror? Halloumi.

What did the executive goat’s PA say? “You’ve goat mail.”

What’s a goat’s preferred beard style? A goatee.

Who’s the naughtiest goat in history? Billy the Kid.

What’s a goat’s worst habit? Butting in. 

What happened when the party was crashed? It goat out of hand.

What do you call a goat trying to procreate? A mounting goat.

Next: 50 Interesting Animal Trivia Questions


Goat It In One-Liners

— Goat Joke One-liners

Why did the goat go to the library? To return a buck.

The goat liked to gossip about the things he herd through the grapevine.

What’s a goat’s favourite quote? No goats, no glory.

Why did the goat’s phone die? Because he forgot to charge the battery.

Why was the billy goat a bad manager? He was too egoatistical. 

What do you call a runaway criminal goat? An escapegoat.

The terrible billy forgoat his kid’s birthday. 

The buck pined over his long lost love. The one that goat away.

The goat travelled from one end of Britain to the other. Land’s End to John o’Goats.

What’s the optimistic goat’s motto? Things can only get feta.

Who started the argument? The instigoater.

Whatever floats your goat.

How did the police goat get a confession? He interrogoated the suspect.

The goat would ruminant over his past mistakes.

Next: 83 Bird Puns


Goat Puns: The Bleatings Of A Goat 

What did the goat say to the shearer? “Cashmere if you can!”

How does the goat get out of an awkward conversation? “Oh no, I’ve goat to go!”

What does the rushed goat say? “I haven’t goat all day!”

What did the goat say when he heard his neighbours arguing? “Here we goat again!”

What did the farmer say to the man who found his missing goat? “You really got my goat!”

What did the little goat say to the farmer at dinnertime? “Pygmy, pygmy first!”

What does the billy say to the badly-behaved kids? “Have you goat anything to say for yourself?”

What did the farmer say when his goats escaped? “Oh, you’ve goat to be kidding!”

How does the grumpy goat tell his friends to shut up? “Stop bleating on!”

How does the goat greet his friends? “Hay there!”

What did the billy say to the suspicious doe? “I’ve never even seen herbivore!”

What did the betrayed goat say? “How could you fursake me?”

What did the whistle-blower goat say to the reporter? “Don’t goat me on that.”

What did the three mummy nanny goats say to their young? “Stop kidding around!”

What did the goat say to the kid-der? “You really goat me!”


We Cudn’t Stop At Just 50

What does a goat call his pals? Furiends.

What does the goat call a furiendly meet up? A goat-together.

Where can you find the most-evolved goats? The Galapagoats. 

I hope you goat a good laugh out of these silly puns. Now, off you goat, have a great day!

Victoria Anne Wise

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Victoria Anne Wise