83 Bird Puns

Take a gander at this assortment of avian puns, they’re a real hoot. 

Are you in need of some bird-brained fun?

If you love birds, puns, and especially puns about birds, perch yourself on the nearest chair and get ready for some winning wordplay about weavers, waterfowl, woodpeckers, and other winged wonders. 

In this article, we let fly with a whole flock of full-fledged bird jokes and puns that will quack you up. We will start by getting all our ducks in a row with a large selection of egg-citing pun-based bird jokes, before moving along to a list of egg-ceptional bird puns and then ending off with a punny list of bird-related films, television shows and songs.   

If you’re looking for cheep laughs just for a lark, read on without feather ado. These puns and jokes are for the birds.

 

Punny bird jokes you can parrot to your friends

 

Musical bird puns  

What do you call birds who don’t know song lyrics?

Hummingbirds

 

Why didn’t The Eagles like to talk to the press?

They thought they were a bunch of vultures

 

Why didn’t Mozart like chickens?

Because they run around going ‘Bach Bach’

 

Medical bird puns

Why is it a bad idea to make an eagle sick?

It’s ill eagle

 

Why don’t ducks like going to doctors?

They’re a bunch of quacks

 

What’s the best way to avoid getting bird flu? 

Getting emu-nized

 

Did you hear about the grumpy owl with an upset stomach?

He had irritable owl syndrome

 

Why did the pelican need to borrow money after seeing the doctor?

He had a massive bill

 

Political bird puns 

Why was Donald Jaybird Trump knocked off his perch?

He tweeted too much

 

Why didn’t Birdie Sanders become president? 

He was too left-wing

 

Why didn’t the goose believe everything she heard?

It was all propa-gander

Next: 40 Tree Puns and Wicked Wordplay Jokes

 

Pop Culture bird puns

Who is the one bird who doesn’t like tweeting?

Mark Zuckerbird

 

Why did Bran from Game of Thrones start acting strange?

He went Stark raven mad

 

Why did Batman’s sidekick go to jail?

He was caught Robin a bank

 

Bird puns for comedi-hens

Which bird roasts you?

A mockingbird

 

Which bird makes you laugh?

A comedi-hen

 

Naughty bird puns

Why did the rooster hang around the henhouse? 

To pick up chicks

 

Why did the chicken and the egg go to bed?

To see which came first

 

Why do men go bird watching? 

To see some tits

 

Why do women go bird watching?

To see some peckers

 

What did the birdwatcher say to the birdkeeper?

Show me your boobies

 

What do you call a bird who doesn’t spit?

A swallow

 

2 birds walk into a bar

Where do crows go for a drink?

A crowbar

 

Why do ducks go to bars?

To wet their beaks

Next: 120 Fish Puns and Jokes that will Leave you Fishing for More!

 

These bird puns may get you arrested

What did the gangster say to the parrot?

We have ways of making you talk

 

Why did the detective start bird-watching the chickens? 

He suspected fowl play

 

What did the police rooster do to the thieving chickens? 

He apre-hen-ded them

 

What happened to the chickens after they got arrested?

They became jail birds

 

Delicious bird puns 

Did you hear about the man who stopped eating chicken?

He went cold turkey

 

Why should you avoid buying a funny chicken?

It may end up roasting you

 

Why did the turkey lie down in the roasting pan and pour butter over itself?

It was self-basting

 

Puns about famous birds 

Which owl is known for being an escape artist? 

Hoo-dini

 

Which bird won a Nobel Prize for Physics?

Stephen Hawk-wing

Next: 100+ Plant Puns that Will Leaf You with Some Good Chives!!

 

Owl by myself

Did you hear about the owl with no friends?

He was owl by himself

 

What do you call party with only two crows?

Attempted murder

 

Why didn’t the rooster watch movies with his family?

He wasn’t into chick flicks

 

Bird puns about flying

How do you warn someone who has a duck flying towards him?

Duck!

 

Do birds practice flying?

No, they just wing it

 

Even the chicken found these crossing-the-road puns funny

Why did the turkey cross the road?

Because he wasn’t chicken

 

Why didn’t the chicken cross the road? 

It didn’t have the guts

 

Why did the chicken go through the PowerPoint presentation?

To get to the other slide

 

Why did Adele cross the road?

To say hello from the other side

 

12 extra bird jokes just to pun-ish you 

How do birds on a wire start a relationship?

They meet online

 

What kind of bird is the cleanest?

Dove

 

What do you call an elephant with a beak?

A pecky-derm

 

Why do Spanish ducks struggle in Lisbon?

They can’t speak Portu-geese

 

What does it sound like when the chickens make a noise?

Clucking terrible

 

What do you say when a turkey is irritating you? 

Go pluck yourself

 

What is a female bird’s favourite thing to read? 

Cawsmopolitan

 

Why is it hard to tell deceased birds apart?

They’re dead wingers

 

What was the dad bird annoyed with his lazy chick?

It wouldn’t leave the nest

 

What do you call a dry parrot?

Polyunsaturated

 

Where do you go if you want to swop birds?

The stork exchange

 

What happened to the bird who was too big to fit in with the flock?

He was ostrich-sized

Next: 80 Paw-Some Dog Puns that Will Have You Barking with Laughter

 

This list of bird puns will quack you up   

  • Better luck nest time 
  • Toucan play at this game 
  • I have no egrets 
  • Egg-citing 
  • Poultry in motion 
  • Im-peck-able
  • That’s hawkward 
  • Three shrikes and you’re out
  • It’s owl or nothing
  • I’m a little bit egg-centric
  • I hope you find our puns emu-sing 
  • Owl never give up

 

Movies for the birds:

  • Apeckalypse Now
  • Owl the king’s men
  • Gone with the wings
  • The Buzzard of Oz 
  • Lord of the Wings
  • Puck to the Future
  • Jurassic Squawk

 

TV shows for the birds:

  • The Wire 
  • How I Pecked Your Mother 
  • Better Caw Saul 
  • Rook and Morty 
  • Pecks in the City

 

Songs for the birds:

  • Squawk like an Egyptian (goose) – The Bangles
  • Lost Caws – Billy Owlish 
  • WAP (Wrens and Parrots) – Cardi B(ird)
  • Tweet It – Mike-owl Jackson
  • Love the way you fly – Wreninem and Rihanna
Daniel Friedman
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