Ho Ho Ho happy laughs, from my huge bag of gifts we bring you a very nice gift the best 55 Christmas dad jokes, for your enjoyment and be with a cup of hot chocolate waiting for my arrival with a big smile ho ho ho.
55 Christmas Dad Jokes to tell this Year
Reminds me of a song
Who gives baby sharks their presents on Christmas?
How much do you store?
How many presents can Santa fit in an empty sack?
Only one. After one present, it is not empty any more.
What does a gingerbread man use to keep his bed warm?
A cookie sheet
A confused stature
Why did Santa’s helper feel sad?
He had low elf-esteem.
Interior Christmas decorations
Why did the doctor warn the dad not to eat Christmas tree decorations?
He didn’t want him to catch tinsel-itis.
The perfect name
Why is is always so cold during Christmas?
Because it is Decembrrrrrrrr.
What did the first snowman says to the second snowman?
“I don’t know about you, but I smell carrots.”
Why is it getting harder to buy Advent calendars?
Because their days are numbered.
It looks like a movie name
What do you call a child who doesn’t believe in Santa?
A rebel without a Claus.
Mrs. Claus did not teach them well …
Why are Christmas trees so bad at knitting?
Because they always drop their needles.
To spend the rest of the year
What is Santa’s favorite state?
Which of Santa’s friends is the most chill?
Best friend of Christmas
What is Santa’s dog’s name?
It is cheaper than coal
What kind of drink does Santa give to naughty girls and boys?
What was wrong with the Grinch on Christmas?
He was feeling claus-trophobic.
Cheerful and polite
When Santa doesn’t want to do something, what does he say?
Makes sense … in its own way
What’s the difference between a knight and Santa Claus? One slays a dragon, the other drags a sleigh.
How do elves respond when Santa takes attendance?
A different language
Why is the alphabet in the North Pole different than the normal alphabet? The North Pole’s alphabet has noel.
That’s why he stays in shape
What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
A nice doorbell
When someone delivers a package to Santa, what do they do?
Ring the (jingle) bell.
A Christmas breakfast
What breakfast do Santa and his wife like to eat together?
For every morning
What’s Santa’s go-to doughnut order?
A jolly-filled doughnut.
The equivalent of the north pole
What do Santa’s elves use to help them walk in the slippery snow?
What does Mrs. Claus sing to Santa on his birthday?
“Freeze a jolly good fellow!”
Like in cartoons
What would Santa be called if he went down a chimney with the fire going?
Why did Santa and Mrs. Claus extend their garden?
They love to hoe hoe hoe.
What smells the most in Santa’s sleigh?
What nationality is Santa Claus?
A good marriage
Why does Mrs. Claus love the Christmas season?
It makes her feel so santa-mental.
Northern fast food
What’s Santa’s go-to fast food order?
Sure is the owner
Where does Santa stay on vacation?
Who automatically gets added to the nice list?
Anyone who cleans their chimney.
What name does Santa use to check-in at hotels on beach vacations?
Santa word games
Whenever someone asks Santa for help with their Christmas tree, what does he say?
What goes “oh-oh-oh?”
Santa walking backwards.
What is Santa and Mrs. Claus’s favorite movie?
For something has that weight
What does Santa say on the night of Christmas?
Time to hit the sack!
We all have one
What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?
A Christmas Quacker!
A merry Christmas
Why did the Grinch go to the liquor store?
He was searching for some holiday spirit
They are everywhere
Where do Santa’s reindeer stop for coffee?
What do you call a snowman that can walk?
How is Christmas exactly like your job?
You do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit.
A luxury motorbike
What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?
A Holly Davidson!
The hat was not enough
Why did Frosty’s wife ask for a divorce?
He was a total flake
Lack of knowledge
Why didn’t Rudolph go to school?
He was elf-taught.
What do elves post on Social Media?
How does Santa take photos?
With a Pole-aroid camera
What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective?
Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy
What did Santa do when he went speed dating?
He pulled a cracker!
At the north pole there is hardly any sun
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Who delivers presents to cats?
What do you call Santa living at the South Pole?
A lost clause!
What does Santa do with out of shape elves?
Sends them to an elf Farm.