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‘What is the difference between’ jokes have been passed around since humans evolved to comprehend that ‘that thing’ is slightly different from ‘that other thing’; not only was this realisation a massive milestone in our history but it signalled the beginning of a comedic rift us humans can’t stop!
We all appreciate a good joke or two, read below for 55 big laughs.
Join us for an all-inclusive ‘spot-the-difference’ trip to laughter-ville!
What’s the Difference Between? This and That Jokes
1. What is the difference between Peter Pan and an aeroplane?
Peter Pan never lands.
2. What is the difference between inhaling laughing gas at the dentist and accidentally inhaling glass powder in a factory?
The pane in your stomach.
3. What is the difference between Spiders and Spider plants?
My Mum loves having Spider plants in her house.
4. What is the difference between a girl ant swimming and a boy ant swimming?
A boy ant floats.
5. What is the difference between a clock and a Mobile Phone?
One of them goes Tik-Tok.
6. What is the difference between learning Sign Language and learning to speak English?
One is pretty handy.
7. What is the difference between an atom and a liar?
Liars don’t make up everything.
8. What is the difference between a Big Cat running a business and Elon Musk running a business?
Cheetahs never prosper.
9. What is the difference between being attacked by a Cheetah and being attacked by a shark?
The big pause.
10. What is the difference between a photon going on holiday and an elephant doing the same?
A photon travels light.
Next: Jokes For Teens
11. What is the difference between an Android and an Apple phone?
Android phones don’t come with an in-built shelf-life.
12. What is the difference between using yesterday’s newspaper for a pillow and using a corduroy pillowcase?
The headlines.
13. What is the difference between reading non-fiction in the past, the present and the future?
The in-tense-ity.
14. What is the difference between the Dentist and the Therapist?
One deals in feelings, the other deals in fillings.
15. What is the difference between Canada’s flag and a dead tree?
A leaf.
16. What is the difference between standing in the rain and standing in the shower?
The water bill.
17. What is the difference between a policeman and an Alligator?
A policeman is not an investi-gator.
18. What is the difference between the old plastic straws and the new paper straws?
Plastic straws suck.
19. What is the difference between dusk and dawn?
I don’t know, I am never awake early enough to see dawn.
20. What is the difference between an argument with a sharp pencil and an argument with a broken pencil?
A sharp pencil has a point.
21. What is the difference between whipping cream and churning butter?
Whipping cream is whisk-y business.
Next: 155 Dad Jokes, Puns, and One-liners
22. What is the difference between a dictionary and a thesaurus?
One is a dinosaur.
23. What is the difference between the original Titanic’s design and if you were to design it for today’s connected way of living?
Now-a-days it would be designed to sync.
24. What is the difference between working as a stock trader and working as a baker?
A baker still kneads the dough.
25. What is the difference between upholstery insurance and table insurance?
With upholstery insurance you are fully covered.
26. What is the difference between a jester and a gesture?
People appreciate nice gestures.
27. What is the difference between underage Dave attempting to buy alcohol and David buying alcohol?
David has his I.D.
28. What is the difference between asparagus stems and scientists?
Asparagus stems grow in a field, but scientists work in the STEM field.
29. What is the difference between zero and nought?
Absolutely nothing.
30. What is the difference between Cryptocurrency and the American Currency?
Cryptocurrency doesn’t make cents to me.
31. What is the difference between riding a horse during the day and riding a horse at night?
One is a night-mare.
32. What is the difference between working with dogs and working with cats?
Cats never work well together but dogs can make good col-labradors.
33. What is the difference between breaking up with a traffic cone and breaking up with a speed bump?
You can get over a speed bumb.
34. What is the difference between an Otolaryngologist and an Oncologist?
An Oncologist is on-call.
35. What is the difference between jumper cables and a pacifist?
A pacifist won’t start anything.
36. What is the difference between a marriage and a job?
You love your wife.
37. What is the difference between a fire breaking out at the circus and a fire breaking out at the zoo?
At the circus the fire is in-tents.
38. What is the difference between drowning in the sea and drowning in varnish?
Drowning in varnish is a nice finish.
39. What is the difference between a pen-cil and a pen’s sex life?
A pen is not cil-abate.
40. What is the difference between dating a fish and dating a man?
A fish is roe-mantic.
Next: 80+ Dog Jokes
41. What is the difference between eating Altoids and being sent to your room?
One is a real punnish-mint.
42. What is the difference between a kitchen counter top made of marble and one made of wood?
You won’t take the wood counter top for granite.
43. What is the difference between studying Geology and studying English?
Studying Geology rocks.
44. What is the difference between a PHD and a Masters?
A degree.
45. What is the difference between a visit from the Taxman and one from a Ninja?
You won’t notice the Ninja visiting.
46. What is the difference between your purse and your husband?
Someone might steal your purse.
47. What is the difference between a kleptomaniac and an actor?
A kleptomaniac takes things literally.
48. What is the difference between Buddy from Toy Story and a Russian Doll?
The Russian Doll is full of herself.
49. What is the difference between being addicted to smoking and being addicted to drinking brake fluid?
You can stop drinking brake fluid at anytime.
50. What is the difference between an atheistic shop and a religious shop?
An atheistic shop is non-prophet.
51. What is the difference between playing Golf during bad thunder and lightning or playing on a nice summer’s day?
Balls.
52. What is the difference between the truth and a lie?
There is no “I” in lie.
53. What is the difference between a comedian and a comedienne?
One of them is funny.
54. What is the difference between deja vu and a joke?
What is the difference between deja vu and a joke?
55. What is the difference between your keys and a legless dog?
A legless dog is always where you left it.
56. What is the difference between your car and your partner?
Your partner won’t drive you insane.
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He writes for pleasure when not writing as work; all his content has the underlying aim to bring joy to others around the world and help them see that there is beauty beyond the pale. If not writing he can be found outside exploring the natural world as much as possible before being called back to his desk! Get in touch with him at his desk.
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