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The 75 Very Best Chicken Jokes

The 75 Very Best Chicken Jokes

For people who like their yolks funny side up. 

There’s something hilarious about chickens. Just watch one clucking about a farmyard for instant slapstick comedy. 

Perhaps that’s why there are so many chicken jokes out there. Whether they’re laying eggs, crossing roads (no, we don’t know why chickens love crossing roads so much either) or just clucking around, chickens are a source of endless amusement  

That’s why we’ve plucked 75 of fowlest chicken jokes from the furthers corners of the internet for your reading pleasure. They’ve been incubating for a while and now we’re ready to serve them to you in a bucket.  

So without feather ado, start reading right away. Or are you chicken?

 

A hensemble of hilarious chicken jokes

 

1. What do chickens tell scary stories about?

The Poultrygeist.

 

2. What do chickens grow on? 

Eggplants.

 

3. What sound does a negative rooster make?

Cock a doodle don’t.

 

4. Why did everyone laugh at the chicken?

She was a real comedihen.

 

5. What do chickens dance to?

Henhouse music.

 

6. Why did the chickens try and escape?

They felt cooped up.

 

7. What do you call a bird that’s afraid to fly?

Chicken.

 

8. How do chickens feel when you remove their feathers?

Plucking terrible.

 

9. What do you call it when a hen takes a rooster’s place in the morning? 

Alarm clucks.

 

10. What do sick chickens get?

Human-pox.

 

11. What do you get if you cross an elephant and a chicken? 

A peckyderm.

 

12. Why don’t chickens like people?

They beat eggs.

 

13. Which US state has the most chickens?

Yolklahoma. 

 

14. Which US state do chickens avoid?

Kentucky.

 

15. What do chickens fear the most?

The Apeckalypse.

Next: 80+ Dog Jokes

 

16. Why did the young rooster act like his dad?

Like feather, like son.

 

17. What do poetic chickens enjoy? 

Spoken word poultry.

 

18. Why are some chickens treated better than others?

Because of the pecking order.

 

19. Why do people pinch their nose when walking past the chicken coop?

Because of the fowl odor.

 

20. How do you get a chicken to read your blog? 

Cluckbait.

 

21. Why did the rooster never come home to his hen?

He was free range. 

 

22. Why couldn’t the chicken find her eggs?

Because she mislaid them. 

 

23. What do you get when you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer 

 

24. Why did the rooster go to KFC?

He wanted to see the chicken strip

 

25. What day of the week are chickens afraid of?

Fry-day!

 

26. What do you call a great chicken?

Impeckable 

 

27. Why didn’t the chicken go to KFC?

It wasn’t on her bucket list.

 

28. How do you send a chicken a letter?

In a henvelope.

 

29. Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

Because if it had four it would be a chicken sedan.

 

30. What do young chickens like to watch?

Chick flicks.

 

31. What do confused chickens lay?

Scrambled eggs.

 

32. What side of the chicken has the most feathers?

The outside.

 

33. Why don’t chicks stop making noise?

Talk is cheep.

Next: 60 Duck Puns

 

Which came first, the chicken joke or the egg joke?

 

1. What do chicken philosophers think about? 

The meaning of eggsistence.

 

2. Why happens when hens and roosters get together    

It’s eggciting.

 

3. What do chickens call it when you crack an egg?

An eggsecution.

 

4. What does a hen say when she lays an egg?

Eggscuse me.

 

5. Why did the policeman interrogate the egg?

To make it crack.

 

6. What do you do if you see a hen laying?

Egg her on.

 

7. How do chickens like their eggs?

Hatched.

 

8. How do comedians like their eggs?

Funny side up. 

 

9. What do you call someone who knows everything about how chickens are born? 

An eggspert.

 

10. Why did the hen show off her eggs?

To set a good egg-xample.

 

11. What did the counsellor say to the egg?

Say no to crack.

 

12. What advice do you give a farmer who’s had some eggs stolen?

Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.

 

13. Why did the farmer lose his eggs?

He had no clutch control.

 

14. Why was the chicken different to the others?

Because she was a little eggcentric.

 

15. What happens if someone cracks an egg on your head?

The yolk’s on you.

 

16. How do you know if an egg joke is good?

If it cracks you up.

 

17. What did the one egg say to the other egg?

Last one out’s a rotten egg.

 

18. What do chickens study in school?

Eggonomics

 

19. How do you test a chicken’s knowledge of Eggonomics? 

Eggzams.

 

20. Why did the chicken lay an egg every day?

She had hendurance.

 

21. When you rub an egg, what does the chicken inside feel? 

Egg-static.

 

22. What do you do with a shy chick?

Try get it to come out of its shell.

 

23. What do you think of these egg jokes?

They aren’t all what they cracked up to be.

 

24. Why did the man order a chicken and an egg off Amazon?

To see which came first.

 

25. Why did the hen only lay in Winter?

She was no spring chicken.

 

26. What happens if you put an egg in the microwave?

It eggsplodes.

Next: 50 Cat Jokes

 

Why did the chicken cross the road jokes?

 

1. Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side!

 

2. Why did the chicken run across the road?
To get to the other side faster.

 

3. Why did the chicken run across the road?

Because the lights were about to change!

 

4. Why did the turkey run across the road?

To prove it wasn’t chicken.

 

5. Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

Because chickens didn’t exist yet.

 

6. Why did the rooster cross the road?

Just to cock a doodle do something.

 

7. Why did the chicken cross the road?
No one knows. But the road will have its vengeance.

 

8. Why did the chicken and the egg race across the road?

To see which came first, the chicken or the egg!

 

9. Why did the penguin cross the road?

Because the chicken was busy.

 

10. What do you call a chicken crossing the road?
Poultry in motion.

 

11. Why did the cactus cross the road?

It was stuck to the chicken.

 

12. Why did the chick cross the road?

For cheep thrills.

 

13. Why did the chicken lawyer cross the road?

To get to the car accident on the other side.

 

14. Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross again?

Because it was a dirty double-crosser.

 

15. Why did the chicken go through the Powerpoint presentation?

To get to the other slide.

 

16. I hope one day chickens will be free to cross the road without having their motives questioned. 

 

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Daniel Friedman
Daniel Friedman