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100 YO DADDY JOKES

100 YO DADDY JOKES

For as long as time can tell, mankind has passed “yo mama” jokes down from generation to generation. From straight-up insulting someone’s mother to joking with friends, these jokes have been popular since, well, forever. How fat someone’s mom is, how dumb, how bald, or ugly- nothing has been off limits. However, times have changed. Now, in 2022, it’s time to break the cycle of insulting moms. Today we’re insulting dads. Dads look out here are 110 different “yo daddy” jokes coming your way:

BEST YO DADDY JOKES

  1. Yo daddy so fat I took a picture of him last Christmas and it’s still printing
  2. Yo daddy so old he sat behind Jesus in the 3rd grade
  3. Yo daddy such a bad cook your family prays AFTER they eat
  4. Yo daddy so poor he goes to the park and ducks give him bread
  5. Yo daddy so fat when God said “let their be light,” he asked him to move out of the way 
  6. Yo daddy so stupid he brought a spoon to the Super Bowl
  7. Yo daddy so fat when he goes camping the bears hide THEIR food
  8. Yo daddy so fat he has to use a boomerang to put on a belt 
  9. Yo daddy so stupid he ordered an LGBT at subway 
  10. Yo daddy so old Moses signed his yearbook
  11. Yo daddy so fat they changed “one size fits all” to “one size fits most”
  12. yo daddy so stupid he failed lunch 
  13. Yo daddy so white your family wears sunglasses inside
  14. Yo daddy so poor his face is on a food stamp
  15. Yo daddy so poor he chased after a garbage truck with his shopping list
  16. Yo daddy so poor he eats cereal with a fork to save milk 
  17. Yo daddy so poor he started charging rent to the roaches 
  18. Yo daddy so fat he wore a gray shirt to the zoo they thought the elephants escaped
  19. Yo daddy so stupid he got fired from a bl0wj0b 
  20. Yo daddy so fat his blood type is Nutella
  21. Yo daddy so fat he doesn’t need the internet because he’s already worldwide
  22. Yo daddy so bald I can see what he’s thinking 
  23. Yo daddy so ugly his portraits hang themselves
  24. Yo daddy so fat he starts the Alphabet with an O. O B C D
  25. Yo daddy so hairy Animal Planet did a 12 part documentary on him 
  26. Yo daddy so fat, he was on the fence about losing weight- but then the fence broke
  27. Yo daddy so fat everytime he leaves the house NASA thinks there’s a new solar eclipse 
  28. Yo daddy so fat when he went swimming the water had to wait it’s turn
  29. Yo daddy so stupid he bought seaweed from his dr-ug dealer
  30. Yo daddy so ugly he went to a dog show and won first place
  31. Yo daddy so old he was a waiter at the last supper
  32. Yo daddy so stupid he asked “what’s the phone number to 911?”
  33. Yo daddy so stupid he booked a doctor appointment with Dr Dre
  34. Yo daddy so bald the minions thought he was their new leader
  35. Yo daddy so stupid he sat on the TV and watched the couch 
  36. Yo daddy so fat he turned a living room into a basement 
  37. Yo daddy so ugly his reflection holds a crucifix
  38. Yo daddy so poor his cardboard house got repossessed 
  39. Yo daddy so poor that when I grabbed a paper plate from the pantry he said, “hey don’t use the good China!”
  40. Yo daddy so ugly even Ripley can’t believe it

40 FUNNY YO DADDY JOKES

  1. Yo daddy so lazy he’s got a remote control for his remote control
  2. Yo daddy such a bad cook he burned my milkshake
  3. Yo daddy so ugly I keep a picture of him in my car so it doesn’t get stolen
  4. Yo daddy so old when he farted dust came out 
  5. Yo daddy so ugly his imaginary friends decided to play with the neighborhood kids 
  6. Yo daddy so fat when he wears boots they turn into flip flops 
  7. Yo daddy so hairy he speaks Chewbaccan
  8. Yo daddy so hairy Bigfoot takes pictures of him
  9. Yo daddy so stupid he went to the movies to see “closed during the winter”
  10. Yo daddy so fat he needs a passport for every time he rolls over 
  11. Yo daddy so stupid he waits for a stop sign to turn green
  12. Yo daddy so skinny they couldn’t see him when he turned sideways 
  13. Yo daddy so old he has an autographed Bible
  14. Yo daddy so short even Yoda made jokes about him 
  15. Yo daddy so nasty his cigarettes got cancer
  16. Yo daddy so boring his book fell asleep
  17. Yo daddy so ugly everytime he swims there’s another lochness monster sighting 
  18. Yo daddy so lazy he took 4 years to come out your grandma 
  19. Yo daddy so nasty the toilet seat caught an S T D
  20. Yo daddy so fat when he backs up he beeps 
  21. Yo daddy so stupid he bought tickets to see Xbox Live
  22. Yo daddy so poor he goes to KFC to lick other peoples’ fingers
  23. Yo daddy so fat the earth was flat before he was buried 
  24. Yo daddy so ugly he laid on the beach and even the tide wouldn’t take him out 
  25. Yo daddy so fat and stupid the only letters of the alphabet he knows are K.F.C.
  26. Yo daddy so stupid he studied for a COVID test
  27. Yo daddy so ugly your grandpa hit him and got arrested for animal abuse 
  28. Yo daddy so fat he farted and caused Hurricane Ian
  29. Yo daddy so ugly he waited in line for the haunted house and made the kids cry before they even went inside 
  30. Yo daddy so dumb he sold the house to pay the mortgage 
  31. Yo daddy so old his driver’s license has hieroglyphics on it
  32. Yo daddy so old his mom had to feed him with a slingshot 
  33. Yo daddy so dumb it took him 3 hours to watch 60 Minutes
  34. Yo daddy so ugly they told him he couldn’t come in the party unless he took off his mask
  35. Yo daddy got so many teeth missing it looks like his tongue is in jail 
  36. Yo daddy so poor he got 2 TV channels: on and off
  37. Yo daddy so dumb he went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth

30 MEANEST YO DADDY JOKES

  1. Yo daddy so old he has a separate entrance for black d*ck
  2. Yo daddy so dark they marked him absent in night school 
  3. Yo daddy so ugly his birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory
  4. Yo daddy so fat they consider him a sacred animal in India 
  5. Yo daddy so disgusting when he gives a B-J it counts as [email protected] 
  6. Yo daddy so old he got sold when he was browsing the antique store 
  7. Yo daddy so dumb his brain died from loneliness 
  8. Yo daddy so ugly your mom got arrested for [email protected] 
  9. Yo daddy so ugly he’s on the FBI’s LEAST wanted list  
  10. Yo daddy so fat, when he goes outside without a shirt tourists stop and think it’s Mount Rushmore
  11. Yo daddy so ugly he went to the store and the cigarettes never came back 
  12. Yo daddy so old he used to babysit Yoda. 
  13. Yo daddy so fat when he got on the scale it said, “I need your weight not your phone number.”
  14. Yo daddy so stupid, he put two quarters in his ears and thought he was listening to 50 Cent.
  15. Yo daddy so fat when he sat on an iPod, he created the iPad!
  16. Yo daddy so ugly he scared the shit out of the toilet
  17. Yo daddy so poor I saw him kicking a can down the street so I asked “what are you doing?” He said, “I’m moving.”
  18. Yo daddy so ugly he makes the onions cry
  19. Yo daddy teeth so yellow that when he smiles, traffic slows down. 
  20. Yo daddy so stupid he stared at a cup of orange juice for 10 hours because it said “concentrate”
  21. Yo daddy so stupid he tripped over the wireless internet
  22. Yo daddy so fat he broke your family tree
  23. 100.Yo daddy so old he helped write the 10 commandments
  24. 101.Yo daddy so stupid when they said “order in the court,” he asked for fries and a shake
  25. 102.Yo daddy so fat when he jumped, astronomers described him as a UFO
  26. 103.Yo daddy so stupid he yelled in an envelope to send a voicemail
  27. 104.Yo daddy so ugly when he looks in the mirror it says, “viewer discretion advised”
  28. 105.Yo daddy so stupid he looked over a glass wall to see what was on the other side
  29. 106.Yo daddy so dumb he bit his computer because it said Apple
  30. 107.Yo daddy so old his birth certificate says “expired” on it  
  31. 108.Yo daddy so fat he uses Google Earth to take a selfie
  32. 109.Yo daddy so lazy he woke up from a coma and went back to sleep
  33. 110.Yo daddy so stupid when I said, “drinks are on the house,” he went and got a ladder.
Jacob Rolison