55 Very Dirty Christmas Pick Up Lines
Be it Baboons or Chimpanzees! Orangutans or Gorillas ! We love all the members of the Monkey and Ape world. There is something about them that puts a smile on all of our faces. Our distant relatives who are one hand so much like us and at the same time so distinctly not us.
Let’s have some fun now with fifty of the funniest jokes about Monkeys, and let’s all have a good Monkey laugh! Hoo Hoo Hah Ooh Ha!
Funny Monkey Jokes
Monkeys love to play the guitar, their favorite is a Gibbon-son.
In the 60’s the monkeys who went into space loved to drink orangu-Tang.
When monkeys play ice hockey they use a Gibb-oni to clean the ice.
If you cross a bee with a monkey they would live in an ape-iary.
Monkeys love video games! Their favorite is SimianCity.
How did the monkey get out of prison ? He esc-aped.
How do monkeys like to travel? In a hot air-baboon.
What does a monkey chef wear? An ape-ron.
Monkeys love cocktails, their favorite is an ape-ritif.
Monkeys make great doctors! They are very good at ape-rations.
Why was the monkey locked up? He went bananas!
Where do monkeys work out? In the jungle gym.
The teenage monkeys got suspended from school for v-apeing
Monkeys love to paint, their work is often described at ape-stract.
Monkeys love to look good, their favorite store is banana republic.
Monkeys love fruit! They love eating bananas and ape-les.
What’s the best time to see the gorillas in the mist? Ape-ril.
Primates make great bakers! They love making monkey bread.
Monkeys love social media, they love snap-chimp.
Why did the monkey lose the job? He failed the ape-titude test.
How does an ape open a banana? With his Mon-key.
Monkeys make fantastic photographers, they really understand ape-rture.
Chimpanzees make great golfers! They are good at swinging.
How do you use a map to find primates? By using the Mon-key.
Monkeys love to be in open relationships, because most of them are swingers.
What kind of coffee do Monkeys drink? A Capuchin-ino.
Monkeys and Apes get married , but only once they have found their Primate.
Monkeys love southern food! Their favorite dish, chimp and grits!
Monkeys are very polite, they are always asking “Howl, are you doing?
Apes and Monkeys are very musical, their favorite instrument is the Tamarin.
What’s a monkey’s second favorite food? Ape-ri-cots!
The monkey’s mom took him to see the doctor, he wasnt peeling well.
What kind of Monkey will you find at the disco? A Funky Monkey!
Why did the Monkeys go to space? To see the Planet of the Apes!
Monkeys who get lost in the desert have been known to see ape-arritions.
Monkeys love to party, their favorite party foods, chimp and dips!
Where do monkeys go for a good time? Monkey-bars.
What’s a monkey’s favorite drink? Jungle Juice.
Where do the smartest monkeys study? Monkey Buisness School.
How do Monkeys bulld their houses, they use a Mandril.
How does Santa visit Monkeys every year at Christmas? He goes down the chimp-ney.
When the ape grew up he wanted to work on cars, he wanted to be a grease Monkey.
Every four years the Monkeys have their own Olympic Games, the winner of the gold medal is their chimpion!
What did the banana do when he saw the Monkey? Split.
Monkeys love to gossip, they hear all the news up and down the ape-vine.
What kind of dog do the wealthy Monkeys have as pets? Chimp-ingese.
Why do ape handshakes last forever? Because of the Gorilla Grip.
What does a Monkey ask when he gets home from work? Who-rang-utang?
What do Monkey moms give their kids after school? Chocolate-Chimp cookies.
Monkeys love Star Wars, their favorite show is the Mandrill-orian.
