The 100 Very Best Boyfriend Jokes

Being happily in love is one of the best feelings in the world. It really doesn’t matter if you just started dating or if you are together for 3+ years, every single phase of the relationship is beautiful. Ahh, love… when you cannot wait to see him, and you feel the butterflies once you see him. When you are together the time just stops, nothing else matters but you and him. 

Love is beautiful, it is kind and it’s funny. However, the key to a successful relationship is being best friends with your boyfriend. And what do boys do with their friends? They roast each other all the time. 

So, in order to speak his language you must roast him here and there, but make sure to not over do it. If you don’t have it in you, or if you want to spice up your humor don’t worry, I got you covered.

Below you will see more than 100 jokes I am more than sure you and your boyfriend will love. Let’s go!

 

100+ Boyfriend Jokes He Would Like to Hear or Maybe Not

 

1. Boyfriend: Do you think my salary is enough for you?
Girlfriend: Well, it’s alright for me, but how will you survive?

 

2. Love is telling your boyfriend to go to hell and worrying if he gets there safely.

 

3. What is the difference between a condom and a boyfriend? Condoms have changed they are no longer insensitive or thick.

 

4. My boyfriend likes to eat vegetables that look like him. Good thing he’s cut-cumber.

 

5. My boyfriend is always exercising when we are at the beach; he always sucks his stomach when a cute girl walks by in a bikini.

 

6. What do mascara and a boyfriend have in common? They both run at the first sign of some emotion.

 

7. I know my boyfriend plans about the future because he always buys an extra case of beer.

 

8. My boyfriend’s idea about honesty in our relationship is him telling me his real name.

 

9. I miss my boyfriend every day, especially when I have to carry my bags up the stairs.

 

10. Do you like sales? Because clothing is 100 percent off tonight.

 

11. Let me tell you boy, on a scale from 1 to 10 you are a good 9 and I am the 1 you need to be a 10.

 

12. I know that you are super busy today, but can you add me to your to-do list?

 

13. Honey, I really wish you were my big toe. Why? Because I would bang you on every single piece of furniture at my house all day long.

 

14. The happiest place on Earth is standing next to you.

Next: 70 Cute Things To Say To Your Boyfriend

 

15. Girlfriend: Honey do you know why I love you so much? Boyfriend: No, why? Girlfriend: Because you are like my coffee, hot and I want to have it every single day.

 

16. Darling, I love you with all my butt, I would gladly say heart, but we must both agree that my butt is bigger.

 

17. Can you guess what is on the menu tonight? Me-n-u!

Next: 100 Flirty Texts For Him

 

18. My boyfriend must be a magician, every time he looks at me my clothes disappear.

 

19. Something is wrong with my knees, every time I am with you; I fall for you all over again.

 

20. I am an organ donor for sure; I gave my heart to you 2 years ago.

 

Flirty jokes for boyfriend

21. Why are you so pale? Are you suffering from lack of vitamin ME?

 

22. Do you feel any butterflies? Sweetheart, I feel the whole animal kingdom when I am with you.

 

23. Do you know the difference between marriage and a relationship? A relationship is a sweet dream, and the marriage is the alarm clock.

 

24. My boyfriend is like dandruff I cannot get him out of my head no matter how hard I try.

 

25. My boyfriend is like asthma. He takes my breath away.

 

26. What is the difference between marriage and a relationship? A relationship is full of love and blind, while on the other hand, marriage is an eye-opener.

 

27. Girlfriend: Never laugh at my choices, because you are one of them.

 

28. Never fall in love with a pastry chef because he will dessert you.

 

29. Girlfriend: Do you want to eat dinner? Boyfriend: Sure, what are the options? Girlfriend: Yes and no.

 

30. How did the phone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring.

 

31. What do you call 2 birds in love? Tweet-hearts.

Next: 52 Hilarious Jokes

 

32. Girlfriend: I love you so much. Boyfriend: Is that you talking or is that the wine talking? Girlfriend: It’s me talking to my wine.

 

33. I once gave my boyfriend the silent treatment for 3 days, after 3 days he said to me; ‘We are getting along pretty good lately.’

 

34. My boyfriend just left me because I have anxiety. Oh, never mind. He just went to the grocery store.

 

35. I love more than my coffee. But please, for your own good, do not make me prove it.

 

36. I know I am madly in love with you because I love you even when I am really, really, really hungry.

 

37. You annoy me more than I thought possible. But I still want to spend every irritating minute with you that’s how much I love you.

 

38. Every single day I fall in love with you more and more. Except for today, today you are really annoying.

 

39. Boyfriends are cool, loving and nice. But have you had garlic bread with extra parmesan?

 

40. Sometimes I wonder why do I even put up with you, but then I remember you put up with me too.

 

41. What is difference between a boyfriend and a child? I can’t find it, can you?

 

42. Love is like having to pass gas. If you try to force it, you’re going to make a big mess.

 

43. Who wears the pants in the relationship? Honestly, we prefer when neither of us is wearing pants.

 

44. What did the elephant say to my boyfriend? How do you breathe through that small, tiny thing?

 

45. Why is kayaking a good first date? Because it a good way to begin a row-mance.

 

46. Knock-knock. Who’s there? Owl. Owl who? Owl, always love you!

 

47. My boyfriend is like my car, he drives me crazy.

Next: 40 Dirty Jokes For Him

 

48. My boyfriend is a gym rat, so he invited me to go to the gym with him. I didn’t show up so I hope that he got the idea that we are not working out.

 

49. Sometimes I look at my boyfriend and I think to myself, damn he’s so lucky to have me.

 

50. What do we say to single people on Valentine’s Day? Happy Independence Day.

 

51. Knock-knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you.

 

52. I told my boyfriend that he’s the cheapest person I have ever met in my life. He responded: ‘I’m not buying it.’

 

53. My boyfriend complains that I do not respect his privacy. At least that’s what it says in his dairy.

 

54. My boyfriend was complaining last night that I do not listen to him or something like that.

 

55. My boyfriend told me that I twist everything he says to my advantage. I choose to take that as a compliment.

 

56. My boyfriend says that he wanted an ideal holiday, so I had to stay at home.

 

57. My boyfriend and I always laugh about competitive we are, but I laugh more.

 

58. Girlfriend: If I said you have an amazing body, would you hold it against me?

 

59. Why are boyfriends like parking spaces? The good ones are always taken.

 

60. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

 

61. Girlfriend: Want to see a magic trick? Boyfriend: Sure. Girlfriend: Bam, you are single!

 

62. I’ll give up my morning chia pudding to spoon you instead.

 

63. Roses are red, violets are blue, and love never crossed my mind until I met you.

 

64. Aside from taking my breath away, what do you actually do for living?

 

65. Girlfriend: I think I have to go to the doctor. Boyfriend: Why? Girlfriend: There is something wrong with my eyes. Boyfriend: What? Girlfriend: I simply cannot take them off of you.

 

66. Can I borrow a hug? I promise I will return it as soon as I can.

 

67. Girlfriend: Honey, can I tie your shoes? Boyfriend: Why? Girlfriend: Because I don’t want you to fall for someone else.

 

68. Girlfriend: Honey, is your name Wi-Fi? Because I am feeling some connection.

 

69. Boo, was that an earthquake or did you rock my world?

 

70. Girlfriend: Darling, can you send me a picture. Boyfriend: Why? Girlfriend: I want to show Santa what I want for Christmas.

 

71. Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.

 

72. I must be a snowflake because I fell for you.

 

73. We committed the perfect crime. You stole my heart and I stole yours.

 

Cute jokes to tell your boyfriend — 74. Although we are not socks, you must admit that we make a great pair.

 

75. I am not a professional photographer, but I can picture us together.

 

76. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and Me together.

 

77. Are you from Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.

 

78. Love means you don’t have to hold in your gas anymore.

 

79. If I were a cat, I would spend all my nine lives with you.

 

80. You are like a dictionary; you add meaning to my life.

 

81. Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you the first thing that I do is that I smile.

 

82. Is there an airport nearby or is my heart taking off?

 

83. Four plus four equals eight, you plus I equals fate.

 

84. If a star would fall every time I think of you the sky would be empty.

 

85. Are you a cat? Because you are purrfect.

 

86. On a scale from 1 to 10 you are the 1 for me.

 

87. Knock knock. Who’s there? Will. Will who? Will you marry me?

 

88. Why is so difficult to find a man who is kind, good looking and funny? Because those men always have boyfriends.

 

89. When you want a man’s company? When he owns it.

 

90. What do a boyfriend and a good employee have in common? They always come early.

 

91. It’s so hot today, I am thinking about calling my ex-boyfriend so I can be around something shady.

 

92. What is a boyfriend’s definition of a romantic evening? Making love.

 

93. I love you more than pizza and pizza is life.

 

94. Girlfriend: I think there is something wrong with your lips. Boyfriend: What? Girlfriend: They are not kissing mine.

 

95. Everyone thinks I am drunk, but the truth is I am just intoxicated by you.

 

96. Feel my shirt, it’s boyfriend material.

 

97. I don’t have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?

 

98. If I’m vinegar, you must be a baking soda because you make me all bubbly inside.

 

99. Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest.

 

100. If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

 

101. Are you a charger? Because I am dying without you.

 

102. Your eyes are like IKEA, I could get lost in them.

 

103. Give me your name so I know what to scream tonight.

 

104. You look a lot like my future husband.

 

105. They say Disney is the happiest place on Earth; well obviously they haven’t been in your arms.

 

106. My doctor says I am lacking vitamin U.

 

107. I’m always on top of important things. Would you like to be on the list?

 

108. Are you a paid social media campaign? Because you’ve made quite the impression on me.

 

To Sum Up

Okay girls and boys, I got you covered with many different boyfriend jokes. So, the next time you are together make sure to read or say some of the jokes and see which one he likes best.

Which one made you laugh the hardest?