Hello there my feathered friends and welcome to a quack-tastic journey into the world of duck puns and jokes! If you’re feeling a little down in the feathers, don’t worry, because we have the right thing to lift your spirits and put a smile on your beak. That’s right, we’re diving headfirst into the pond of hilarity to bring you 65 of the most egg-cellent, side-splitting and downright hilarious duck puns and jokes.
Now, you might be thinking, “duck puns and jokes? What in the name of birdseed could be so funny about those little quackers?” Well, ducks are the punniest creatures on the planet. From their webbed feet to their bill and their little waddle, ducks just lend themselves to punny wordplay. And we’re not just talking about your average duck jokes here, we’ve got everything from egg jokes to bird puns. So, sit back, relax and let’s get this egg-ceptional pun-fest started. Trust me, these jokes are no yolk, and they’ll have you laughing so hard that you’ll need a nest to recover in. So, without further ado, let’s get quackin’!
What the duck…
What is a duck’s favorite arcade game? Quack-a-mole
What do ducks use to fix broken things? Duck tape!
What did the duck detective say to his duck partner? Let’s quack this case.
What was the name of the secret duck agent? James Pond.
What time do ducks wake up? The quack of dawn.
What did the duck lawyer say at the court? “I demand an egg-splanation!”
What do you get if you mix ducks with explosives? Firequackers.
What’s a duck’s favorite rally? The Duckar
What are duck fairytales? Ducktales.
What did the anti-ducks geese say? “Quack is wack.”
What’s a duck’s favorite part of the local news? The feather forecast.
What do ducks carry their stuff in? Quack-packs!
What’s a duck’s favorite sauce? Quackamole!
What is a duck’s favorite director? Quentin Quackantino
What happens when a duck hiccups? It lays scrambled eggs.
What type of movies do ducks like to watch? Duck-umentaries.
What’s a duck’s favorite movie? Lord of the Wings.
What’s a duck’s favorite politician? Barack Oduckma
What do you call a rude duck? A duck with a quackitude.
What do ducks throw in their soups? Quackers.
What language do the geese speak?Portu-geese.
What does a duck say when they are sick? They’re feeling under the feather.
What’s a duck’s favorite animal? Quackodiles.
What goes “quick quick”? A duck with the hiccups.
What is a duck afraid of in the sea? The quacken.
What did the duck say to end up in jail? Duck the police.
What name has a band with a cow and a duck on it? Cheese and quackers.
What do you call a duck spirit? A poultrygeist.
What is a duck’s favorite manga? Slam Duck
What app do ducks use to learn new languages? Duckolingo
What game does a duck play at a pub? Bill-iards.
What part of the body does a duck work out? Quack-packs.
What do you call a smart duck? A wise quacker.
What’s a duck’s favorite vegetable? An eggplant.
What did the cow tell the duck when he won the lottery? You lucky duck.
What has fangs and a beak? Count Duckula.
What is a duck’s favorite suit? A duck-sedo.
What does a duck say when he disagrees? “That’s reduckulous.”
What is a duck that studied medicine? A ducktor
What is the baby duck’s favorite game? Beak-a-boo
Why the duck…
Why do most ducks live in the US? Because they like Duckota.
Why did the duck get a second job? He had too many bills.
Why did the duck end up in handcuffs? He was selling quack.
Why don’t ducks need the internet? The web is already on their feet.
Why did a duck go to the bank? She wanted to get more bills.
Why do ducks like bonfires? They love seeing them quackle at night.
Why did the duck love the movie? Because it was a quacksterpiece
Why did the duck go to the physiotherapist? To get it’s back quacked.
Why did the duck annoy the professor? He couldn’t stop quackin’ jokes in class.
Why do ducks lay eggs? If they dropped them, they would break.
Where, when and how the duck…
How do you know if a duck has fear? He’s quacking in his boots.
How do ducks make biscuits? They use Bis-quack.
How can you differentiate two duck siblings? You can’t because they look egg-xactly the same!
Where do ducks live? Bill-dings.
Where do tough ducks come from? Hard-boiled eggs.
Where can you find pictures of duck feet? They’re on the webbed
When is roast duck bad for your health? When you’re the duck.
Funny duck quotes and some duck knowledge…
“When the ducks are walking, you know it’s too windy to play golf.”
“The perils of duck hunting are great – especially for the duck.”
“If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it’s a duck.”
“When the ducks are quacking, the frogs take it as a warning.”
“The roast duck can fly no more.”
“Like a duck on the pond. On the surface, everything looks calm, but beneath the water, those little feet are churning a mile a minute.”
“Man who waits for a roast duck to fly into mouth must wait a very, very long time.”
“Some birds avoid the water, ducks seek it.”