100 Dirty Pick Up Lines

Pick up lines, you have all heard of them, and you can bet your bottom dollar that you have used them at some point in your life. And yet, choosing what to say in which situation can be a challenge, even for the best of people. So here is a lowdown on some of the cheekiest, ‘dirtiest’ pick up lines that are on offer. If you are brave enough, why not use one yourself.

 

Funny Yet a Little Dirty PickUp Lines

We have all been there. Your friend wants you to choose the next woman that walks by at the bar and use his favourite pick up line. At the very least, you are going to get a reaction, but whether it is an ever-lasting impression that turns out to be favourable is anyone’s guess. Still… There is no harm in trying to evoke some laughter. So here are a select few that are bound to make someone giggle.

You’ve been a bad girl. Go to my room

Hi, I’m an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus

If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head

The word of the day is legs. Let’s go back to your place and spread the word

Your body is a wonderland, and I want to be Alice

If you don’t want to have kids with me, then why don’t we just practice

Do you know what would look good on you? Me

Sit on my lap and tell me the first thing that pops up

Did you fart because you blew me away

Do you know karate because your body is kickin

Were you arrested earlier? It’s gotta be illegal to look that good

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged

Your Daddy must have been a baker, cause you got the nicest set of buns I’ve ever seen

Hey baby, you must be a light switch, coz every time I see you, you turn me on

You’re so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

Do I know you from somewhere? Because I don’t recognize you with your clothes on

That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap next to my bed

I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle

You’re like milk, I just wanna make you part of my complete breakfast

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package

I hope there’s a fireman around, cause you’re smokin’!

Are you smoking? (No!) Oh, yes you are!

Hey I just realized this, but you look a lot like my next girlfriend

You’re so hot, that when I look at you I get a tan

You look so sweet you’re giving’ me a toothache

Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I’m here after

Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only TEN I see

Were you arrested earlier? It’s gotta be illegal to look that good

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged

You’re so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

I bet you $40 you’re gonna turn me down

Excuse me, do you have your phone number, I seem to have lost mine

Next: How to Start a Conversation on Tinder 

 

Sexual Pick-Up Lines

If laughter is not the way you want to go, but you prefer something more direct, there is always the prospect of doing some dirty talk. Whilst that can backfire and seem overly creepy, with several alarm bells going off, if you play it right, you might walk away with the girl. Here are some lines that might tickle your fancy.

The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on thefloor

Let’s go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply

Wanna play war? I’ll lay on the ground and you blow the fuck outta me

If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head?

If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?

My dick’s been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?

If I told you I had a 2-inch dick would you fuck me? (No) Good, because mine is 8 inches.

I just checked my schedule and I can have you pregnant by Christmas

I’m like Domino’s Pizza. If I don’t cum in 30 minutes, the next one is free

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put you between F and CK…

Hey I’m looking for a treasure, Can I look around your chest?

Are you gay? (No) Wow, me neither, let’s have sex

Wanna play carnival? You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh

Let us let only latex stand between our love

Hey baby, as long as I have a face, you’ll have a place to sit

Hey baby there’s a party in my pants and you are invited

Do you like chicken? Sorry, I haven’t got any, how about a cock?

(Look down at your crotch) It’s not just going to suck itself

Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under

Could you do me a favor? Could you get on your knees and smile like a donut?

Do you believe guys think with their dick? (Yeah.) Well, in that case, will you blow my mind?

There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?

This is a condom. If we put it on, we can have sex.

Do you believe in free love? (No) Then how much for a blowjob?

Want to make a porno? We don’t have to tape it

Do you live on a chicken farm? (No) You sure know how to raise cocks

That’s a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

Do I know you from somewhere? Because I don’t recognize you with your clothes on

Hi, I’m the new Milkman. Do you want it in the front or the back?

Screw me if I am wrong, but haven’t we met before?

I’ve just moved you to the top of my ‘to do’ list

Excuse me, but do you give head to strangers? (No) Well then, allow me to introduce myself.

That dress looks great on you… as a matter of fact, so would I

Let’s have a party and invite your pants to come on down

Next: 50 of the Worst Pick Up Lines

 

Best Pick Up Lines

If neither of the above do themselves justice, then why not try out these tried and tested pick up lines below. They are less audacious than the previous ones, but certainly leave a punch behind.

You must be in a wrong place – the Miss Universe contest is over there

Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?

Hey I just realized this, but you look a lot like… my next girlfriend

Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?

I’m not drunk; I’m just intoxicated by you

Excuse me, but I DO think it’s time we met

There is something wrong with my cell phone. (What’s wrong with it?) It doesn’t have your number in it

You see my friend over there? [Point to friend] He wants to know if YOU think I’M cute

How much does a polar bear weigh? (I don’t know, how much?)

I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile.So, would you smile for me?

I don’t think I want your babies, but I wouldn’t mind refining my baby making technique with you

I would tell you a joke about my penis, but it’s too long

I’d love to see you wearing your birthday suit

I’m a mind reader and yes I will sleep with you

I’m a zombie, can I eat you out?

I’m an adventurer and I want to explore you

I’ve recently qualified as a gynecologist and I’d like to offer you my pro-boner services

If you were an elevator, what button would I have to push to get you to go down?

If you’re feeling down, I can feel you up

Is it hot in here? Or is it just you?

Just to be clear, we’re both heading for the same bed tonight, right?

Remember my name, because you’ll be screaming it later

Roses are red. Violets are fine. You be the 6. I’ll be the 9

Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes

That dress looks really good on you but it would look better on my bedroom floor

That’s a nice shirt. Can I try it on after we have sex?

The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it insideyou?

The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor

Treat me like a pirate and give me that booty

What’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don’t have a Ferrari

Your body is made up of 70% water. . .and I’m thirsty

With school, I just want an A. With you, I just want to F

You are so selfish. You’re going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night

 

So there you have it. Why not try out some of these and let us know what you think in the comments section below.

 

More PickUp Lines You’ll Love:

70 Star Wars Pick Up Lines
75 Minecraft Pick Up lines
100 Flirty Pick Up Lines
50 of the Worst Pick Up Lines

 

Hasib Afzal
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