80 Snow & Winter Jokes

It’s cold and wet and all you want to do is stay inside and keep warm.

Yep! It’s winter again, so sit back by the fire and warm up with 8o side-splitting jokes guaranteed to warm you up!

 

Snow Jokes

1- What does a snowman call dandruff?
Snowflakes.

 

2- What kind of haircut did the snowman get?
Frosted tips.

 

3- What does a snowman eat for breakfast?
Frosted Flakes.

 

4- What is a snowman’s favorite drink?
A slushy

 

5- How do you know when a snowman is nervous?
He is surrounded by yellow snow.

 

6- What is a snowman’s favorite pet?
A B-Lizzard

 

7- Why was the sled stuck in the snow?
Because it got to-bog-ganed

 

8- Where do witches go skiing?
Slalom.

 

9- What does a snowman eat with his burger?
Cold-slaw.

 

10- What happens when a snowman spills his coffee?
Cold brew.

Next: 50 Bear Puns

 

11- What story do snowmen read to their children?
Snow White.

 

12- What is a snowman’s favorite food?
Chilli.

 

13- Where do snowmen keep their savings?
A snowbank.

 

14- What’s it called when all the snowmen visit New York?
Sleet week.

 

15- What does it say outside the snowman’s school?
Caution Chill-dren Crossing.

 

16- What is a British snowman’s favorite drink?
Iced Tea.

 

17- Why was the snowman yelling?
He was having a meltdown.

 

18- How does a yeti stay fit?
By working his abdoni-minables.

 

19- Why did the snowman have dandruff?
His head was flaky.

 

20- Why did the snowman get dumped by his partner?
She was cold-hearted.

Next: Guess What Jokes

 

21- How did the Snowman win the boxing match?
By coldcocking his opponent.

 

22- What do Snowmen put on their pimples?
Cold cream.

 

23- Not everyone believes in the abominable snowman.
Yeti exists.

 

24- Why did the snowman scold his dog?
He was too nippy.

 

25- What’s a snowman’s favorite type of apple?
An apple crisp.

 

26- Why did the snowman scold his dog?
He was biting.

 

27- What is a Snowman’s favorite soup?
Cream of B-leek.

 

28- What did the snowman say to his child who wanted the day of school?
Snow way!

 

29- What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A puddle.

 

30- What sandwiches do snowmen avoid?
A tuna melt.

 

31- What do you call getting bitten by a snowman?
Frostbite.

 

32- How do snowmen greet each other?
Ice to meet you.

 

33- What happened to the snowman boxer?
He was knocked out cold.

 

34- Why was the baby snowman crying?
Her mother S-colded her.

 

35- Where do penguins go to the movies?
The Dive in.

 

36- When do snowmen go after they graduate school?
The snow ball.

 

37- What do you call it when snowmen kiss?
Snow Kissed.

Next: 64 Animal Jokes 

 

38- What do snowmen in San Francisco eat?
Ice-A-Roni.

 

39- What did the baby snowman call his dad?
Pop-sicle.

 

40- Where did they put the snowman who was misbehaving in jail?
Ice-olation.

 

Winter Jokes

1- Why did the chicken cross the road?
He was walking south for the winter.

 

2- How did Batman get to the Penguins hideout?
He took his snowmobile.

 

3- Why do skeletons hate winter?
They get chilled to the bone.

 

4- Why do bears hibernate in winter?
So they don’t Netflix and chill.

 

5- Why do bears like dogs in the winter?
Because they are chilly dogs.

 

6- How does a snowman get to work?
He rides a Bi-icicle.

 

7- What do you get when you milk a cow in the winter?
Ice cream.

 

8- Where do bears keep their money?
In a slush fund.

 

9- What do you call drag racing in the winter?
Snow drifting.

 

10- What do bears wear when they hibernate?
Snow caps.

Next: 60 Water Puns and Jokes 

 

11- What do bears have in their homes?
Fir-nature.

 

12- What do you call a messy storm?
A squall-or.

 

13- Why do musicians like the winter?
So they can play cool jazz.

 

14- Why are mountains always warm?
They are wearing snowcaps.

 

15- Why is it easier to say the alphabet at Christmas?
There is Noel.

 

16- Why are snowflakes like fingerprints?
They are one of a kind.

 

17- How does a German skier cry for help?
Alp! Alp!

 

18- Why is Vanilla Ice popular in the winter?
Ice Ice baby.

 

19- What do you call a sled that belongs to Bob?
A Bobsled.

Next: 70 Best Ice Cream Jokes 

 

20- Why did the bird get lost when flying south for winter?
She was a Tern.

 

21- What do you call a reindeer with no eyes?
No Idea.

 

22- What do elves take when they are stressed?
A chill pill.

 

23- What did the Irish snowman say to the Easter bunny?
There is a nor’easter.

 

24- Why is blackcurrant the fastest sorbet to eat?
It’s made of blackice.

 

25- Why don’t people sunbathe in the winter?
It’s a bit nipply.

 

26- What’s type of building is the tallest in Antarctica?
It’s an Ice Scraper.

 

27- Why do women not hike four days out of every month?
Because they have their crampons.

 

28- What’s a bear’s favorite type of pie?
Shepherds pie.

 

29- Why did the winter Olympian pick his nose?
He had a Luge-e.

 

30- Where is the best place to keep a fire?
The fireplace.

 

31- How do musicians keep the beat in winter?
With a cold snap.

 

32- What do you send to a sick friend in winter?
A get well soon card-igan.

 

33- How do you call a cab in winter?
You hail it.

 

34- What do you call a female wind?
Gale.

 

35- How does an Inuit man build his home?
With gloo.

 

36- How does a gingerbread man pay for things?
With dough.

 

37- Did you hear about the scarecrow in winter?
He was Ice-solated.

 

38- How do people say their prayers in winter?
Hail Mary.

 

39- What did the seal say when they swam into a wall?
Dammn.

 

40. Why does everybody love winter?
Because it’s snow much fun!

Nicholas Thomas
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