75 Viral Medieval Pick Up Lines for Today’s Age

Looking for pick up lines that sound like they rode straight out of a castle courtyard? Medieval pick up lines are dramatic, poetic, over-the-top, and absolutely hilarious perfect for themed parties, Ren Faire weekends, fantasy-loving friends, or anyone who appreciates a little old-world charm with their flirting.

In this list, you’ll find witty knight jokes, romantic bard-style lines, courtly compliments, and plenty of medieval mischief. Use them to impress your “fair maiden,” “gallant knight,” or your crush who secretly wishes they lived in a castle.

Below, you’ll find 75 clean, funny, and delightfully medieval pick up lines organized by theme. Choose your weapon wisely.

Medieval Pick Up Lines: Courtly, Cute & Chivalrous

Courtly & Romantic Medieval Pick Up Lines

• “M’lady, didst thou fall from heaven, or art thou merely descended from royalty?”
• “If beauty were a kingdom, thou wouldst rule it with grace.”
• “My heart is thy vassal—command me as thou wilt.”
• “I traveled many lands, yet none compare to the sight of thee.”
• “Fair maiden, may I have the honor of stealing—er, sweeping—thy heart away?”
• “You shine brighter than any chalice of gold in the king’s treasury.”
• “Couldst thou spare a moment? My heart hath wandered and found thee.”
• “Even the court bard could not craft words worthy of thy beauty.”
• “If I had a banner, it would bear thy name.”
• “One glimpse of thee, and I’m more enchanted than any spell.”

Knight-In-Shining-Armor Pick Up Lines

• “Doth thou believe in love at first sight, or must I ride by again?”
• “Fear not, m’lady—my armor may be heavy, but my devotion is light as air.”
• “If slaying dragons wins thy favor, point me toward the nearest beast.”
• “I vow to protect thee… mostly from awkward suitors such as myself.”
• “My sword is sharp, but my feelings for thee are sharper.”
• “Wouldst thou join me on a noble quest—for dinner?”
• “If thou needest rescuing, I promise not to charge a rescue fee.”
• “I may not be the strongest knight, but I promise to carry thy heart safely.”
• “My armor glints not from polish, but from seeing thee smile.”
• “If honor demands I court thee, then honor shall be fulfilled.”

Playful & Cheeky Medieval Pick Up Lines

Flirty Bard Pick Up Lines

• “Wouldst thou inspire my next ballad? It shall be titled The One Who Stole My Heart.”
• “I’m no bard, but I’d sing for thee—poorly, but passionately.”
• “If I pluck my lute as well as I pluck hearts, thou art in danger.”
• “Thy beauty makes my quill tremble… though that may also be nerves.”
• “May I compare thee to a summer feast? Delightful and much anticipated.”

Renaissance Faire–Style Flirting

• “Hark! Was that thunder, or did my heart just stumble as thou walked by?”
• “I beg forgiveness, for I cannot stop gazing upon thy visage.”
• “If thou wert ale, I’d drink thee daily.”
• “Do my eyes deceive me, or did an angel get lost at the Faire today?”
• “Blessings upon thee—also, can I get thy number?”

Sassy Medieval One-Liners

• “Did someone enchant thee? Because thou art spellbinding.”
• “Pardon me, thou dropped something—my jaw.”
• “Are you a castle gate? Because thou hast my heart locked in.”
• “Art thou a torch? For thou hast lit up the entire hall.”
• “Thou must be a potion of charm, for my will is no longer mine.”
• “Thy presence warms me more than any tavern hearth.”
• “Are you a scroll? Because I’d like to unravel your mysteries.”
• “If thou wert a crown, I’d wear thee forever.”
• “Dost thou practice magic? For every time I look, the world vanishes.”
• “I’m but a humble peasant—yet thou makest me feel like royalty.”

Medieval Pick Up Lines for Fantasy Lovers & D&D Fans

• “Are you a healing potion? For my heart is revived upon seeing thee.”
• “If thou wert XP, I’d level up every time you smiled.”
• “Thy charisma score must be a natural 20.”
• “Art thou a dragon? For I am drawn to thy fiery spirit.”
• “If thou grantest me a quest, I promise not to fail my roll.”
• “Our love story would rival any campaign saga.”
• “Thou cast Charm Person—admit it.”
• “I’d cross any realm just to meet thee.”
• “If fate be the dungeon master, clearly it ship-eth us.”
• “Care to join my party—for quests, cuddles, or both?”

Funny Medieval Pick Up Lines (Perfect for Laughs)

Outrageously Silly Lines

• “Thy father must be a blacksmith, for he forged a masterpiece.”
• “Are you bread? Because my heart rises when thou art near.”
• “I’d joust for thou—even if I never win.”
• “Art thou a royal decree? Because my heart obeys.”
• “If thou wert a stew, thou’d be the hottest in the tavern.”
• “Thy smile could tame the wildest horse in the kingdom.”
• “If I had a chicken, I’d trade it for a moment with thee.”
• “Thou art sweeter than mead after a long battle.”
• “Is thy name Wi-Fi? For truly, we are well-connected.”
• “Are you armor polish? Because you’ve brightened my day.”

Slightly Cheeky, Still Clean

• “Thou hast stolen my heart; I shall not demand its return.”
• “If thou be tired, rest thy beauty upon my shoulder.”
• “Thou art the jewel missing from my crown.”
• “My heart plays the lute every time thou enterest the room.”
• “One kiss from thee could revive even the sleepiest kingdom.”
• “Thou art rarer than a dragon’s tear and twice as precious.”
• “If thou wert an arrow, my heart would gladly be thy target.”
• “My love for thee is stronger than any castle wall.”
• “Art thou a feast day? For thou makest my soul rejoice.”
• “If thou wilt be my queen, I shall be thy loyal fool.”

Medieval Pick Up Lines for Her

• “Fair maiden, thou hast conquered my heart with but a glance.”
• “Thy grace puts the moon itself to shame.”

Medieval Pick Up Lines for Him

• “Good sir, thy strength slays more than beasts—it slays my composure.”
• “Thou art the bravest knight, for thou hast faced my gaze and survived.”

Universal Medieval Pick Up Line (Use Anytime!)

• “In all the kingdoms and all the ages, I’d still choose thee.”

Medieval pick up lines are all about big gestures, dramatic flair, and a touch of humor. Whether you’re wooing someone at a Renaissance Faire, sending a playful text, or adding a fun twist to your D&D night, these lines bring instant charm.

Use them boldly, speak them proudly, and above all, have fun. May fortune favor your flirtation!